photo credit: Robyn's  Nest via photopin cc

photo credit: Robyn’s Nest via photopin cc


If you were a charm

I could hang you from a chain

dangling from my arm

protected from all pain.

If you were a charm

sparkling in the light

I could keep you from all harm

always in my sight.

If you were a charm

hanging from my wrist

shimmering while you sway

unable to persist…

in going astray,

in roaming far,

in rebelling all the day

with behavior bizarre.

But if you were a charm

I might never see

when your heart softens

and returns to me.

©Dawn Paoletta

Linking with my friends at dVerse for the monthly Open Link Night!

24 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. shortybear
    May 21, 2014 @ 20:31:44

    So very beautiful.


  2. shanyns
    May 24, 2014 @ 12:53:00

    Love this! 🙂


  3. brian miller
    May 31, 2014 @ 15:23:45

    makes me think of children…and we can keep them safe for a bit…and keep them close…but we have to let them go to find their way…and so they can return to us as well….smiles…

    charm bracelets are cool though….little stories round the wrist…


  4. K. A. Brace
    May 31, 2014 @ 15:31:46

    Dawna, I enjoyed the vehicle of the charm very much, but I think had you not made it so passive–“If you were a charm…” and instead began “You are a charm I hang on a bracelet…” it would have been more powerful and perhaps opened avenues of thought you hadn’t been aware of. >KB


    • enthusiasticallydawn
      May 31, 2014 @ 15:43:42

      Oooh…thanks, I may rework it and see where it leads! Appreciate your input. I was contemplating and writing to/about a specific person, and in the moment.


      • K. A. Brace
        May 31, 2014 @ 15:53:47

        You are welcome. I am glad you took my criticism, right or wrong so well. I have decided that it is tiume everyone stepped up and sid what they really felt in a kind, caring and constructive way–which is one of the basic tenents of this group if I am not mistaken. Best>KB

  5. claudia
    May 31, 2014 @ 15:36:41

    i’m all for letting go to find or be returned to… love the image you use to make your point


  6. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
    May 31, 2014 @ 15:37:21

    Ah to keep someone tied.. but still isn’t that return with softened hearts worth a thousand ties..


  7. markwindham
    May 31, 2014 @ 15:54:02

    nicely done, excellent flow and rhythm


  8. Mary
    May 31, 2014 @ 16:14:18

    I read your poem a few times, Dawn. I thought about it. It made me think that I guess if we keep someone attached to ourselves we would never know if they would come to us of by their own choice if they weren’t attached. We might hate to set them free, wondering if they would return. But …. in the end I think it is worth it to really know. An intriguing poem, Dawn.


  9. freyathewriter
    May 31, 2014 @ 16:14:50

    I enjoyed the message of this. Keeping someone tied to you doesn’t work, in the long run.


  10. Sherry Blue Sky
    May 31, 2014 @ 16:16:07

    Oh, I so relate to this poem – especially when it comes to wanting to protect our children from all harm, their rebellion, and then their eventual return………you captured it so well.


  11. Gabriella
    May 31, 2014 @ 17:19:19

    I like how you express that, in love as with a lot of other things, freewill matters.


  12. Grace
    May 31, 2014 @ 19:59:54

    I am thinking of children, letting them go and them returning to us ~ This is a lovely write, thanks ~


  13. Audrey Howitt
    May 31, 2014 @ 20:01:37

    Lovely write Dawn–we all want to protect them—


  14. J Cosmo Newbery
    May 31, 2014 @ 20:41:15

    A charming poem of hope!


  15. Sabra Bowers
    May 31, 2014 @ 22:06:58

    Love the ending. Great build-up for it.


  16. pandamoniumcat
    Jun 01, 2014 @ 00:10:45

    Lovely poem, so sweet.


  17. scotthastiepoet
    Jun 01, 2014 @ 07:00:03

    Very tenderly done – I very much enjoyed this delicate weave of a simple metaphor. With Best Wishes Scott


  18. vivchook
    Jun 01, 2014 @ 08:21:54

    Lovely, Dawn. Yes, it’s always tempting, when you love someone so much, to hold them too close. This is really beautiful. – Vivienne, of OneVoicePoetry (with Bjorn)


  19. lynndiane
    Jun 01, 2014 @ 16:49:40

    this describes mother love exactly…lovely words, like a charm!


  20. Barry D.
    Jun 01, 2014 @ 19:13:04

    Beautiful. Thoughtful sentiment, and oh, so beautiful.


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