Here we are on Day 31 of #write31days in October. If you have followed me…and I suspect I have a total of three people reading my posts for this series. I could be wrong, but it really doesn’t matter.
I know this will be my last year participating.
This year has been a year of revelation. Not so much about the things of God, but more about the things of Dawn. God continues to reveal Himself to me, and show me the areas in my life I am not trusting Him with. He shows me that I default to worldliness and self-reliance in places He wants to completely take over. He wants to give me more, show me the joy which comes from trusting in Him for every good and perfect gift. But, I look to the right, left, to the moon, sun, stars…and take my eyes right off the One who created them.
This year I finally returned to the gym.
The gym, at one time in my life, was what my desk is to me now. The place where I discovered truth, between counting reps, sets, and hours on the clock. The place where God met me, between training sessions, posing routines, smelly pre-packed meals, too many protein shakes and a steady stream of clients.
God never fails to meet me where I am. He uses the mundane, often, to reveal the magnificent. Trivial, seemingly insignificant things, are but object lessons in His classroom. Everything is a portal to truth to the student willing to lean in, listen and learn from the One who is Truth.
I discovered what I call an “old school” gym. Old school in the sense that it has pictures hanging on the wall from the eighties, and equipment from the same time…possibly the seventies for some of the equipment, now that I think about it. But, truth be told, it brought me back. Back to a time in my life when I was starting out. It felt, primordial in some way. I wanted to tap into the discipline I had those early days…tap something from them, and pull it back to now.
The magic of hindsight is that it shows you things you couldn’t see at the time, but it can’t keep you from trying to go back and capture the essence of the moment.I went and thankfully had only signed up for 3 months. Now understand, I can a easily create any number of wonderfully eclectic workout combinations including everything from Pilates to Plyometrics, from Strength Training and Body-weight Bootcamp to Basic Yoga. It was my career for over 20 years. And I do enjoy designing and creating class formats, programs, and routines for individuals and groups. But, in the beginning…when I was young, and had not all the experiences I was to have which developed me into the person I was to become …I went to the gym. It was my starting place. My romping ground. It was a season, and God moved me to excellence through it in many ways. Then He began to draw me out of the field. I resisted, my identity too intertwined in who I was then. He taught me that our roles here…all of them, are transient. He showed me that my identity needed to be rooted in Him, in fact was, but I needed to be more rooted in Scripture to understand the reality.
Every step is either one toward or away…always, we move towards one thing and away from another. God changes our desires if the Holy Spirit resides within us. Flat out truth.
After about 6 weeks of my great “comeback”, I realized I no longer have any desire to exercise in any gym, never mind the “old school one”. But, I had to go back, and touch it…to see if there was anything left for me there.
My knees, hips, shoulders and neck unanimously agreed, they don’t appreciate the lifting I so loved in the past. They prefer some of the other ways I stay active now, during this season. I am not the twenty-something starting out. I am the fifty-something wanting to finish well.
It was like that for these 31 Days…I’ve been moving on and away from a blogging platform to something else…still being defined. I came to see, touch, and feel the rhythm here once more. I had to see if something was here for me.
Because, there was a season when blogging brought me smack, dab, right into the middle of God’s plan for my life. It was a building block and stepping stone in His path for me. Like my competitive bodybuilding, power-lifting, and fitness career.
But, sometimes He is ready to move on, and I linger. Like the child at the party refusing to come away with Papa. Afraid I might miss something…forgetting Papa cares for me and withholds no good thing from me. Too often I am that forgetful child.
Papa has other things planned for me. Some may be with my writing. Some things have yet to be revealed. My job? To remember His love, trust His faithfulness, yield to His prompting, rely on His grace.
Oh, about this writing redeemed. You can bet I’ll not stop. I am a journal keeper and that will not change. I believe part of my writing journey includes sharing my writing and speaking words of life through this gift. I’m not clear yet to what degree exactly. But, I know the One who is. And I think I’m gonna let Him determine the next steps. As surely as He showed me the gym was not where I’d find joy in my journey. He’ll guide me to the one, or many who also will benefit from the words I share.
At the start of 2016 with my mom’s cancer diagnosis, my writing became primarily my therapist and therapy. Sharing words took a backseat for this ride and I sat wide-eyed most of the way, wondering what the other side of this journey would look like. It feels surreal in retrospect, this path we have traveled. She has come through wonderfully and my prayer is for her joy to be made complete in Jesus who has brought her through this fiery trial.
To the three people who have joined me on this journey, I want to thank you for being here. I especially want to mention Syl, at the Slver Pen, for her e-mails, comments and presence…I still never did get to that response post! It’s in drafts.
Did you participate in #write31days? Why or why not? If you didn’t will you reconsider next year?
If you did, what were your biggest obstacles to writing, and were you able to read others’ posts regularly? Will you participate again next year? Why or why not?
I would love to know your thoughts on this #writingredeemed journey I shared, if there was anything you wish I would have written about or covered? (I’m up for writing based on your requests- if able!)
This is my story, this is my song…
I am Writing Redeemed in October for 31 Days,
Thank you for joining me on the journey. I pray my sharing encourages you in your own journey. Write about it, journal it, share it! Most of all, encourage another along the way.